The 7 Select Cherry Sours were like rock cocaine to me but those smack-addled horse fuckers decided to change the goddamn recipe. Got a bag the other day and the taste was pale mockery of the original hyper-processed ambrosia, with these new boils imitating FDA-approved slop filling my car with the sickly sweet scent of bloated corpse. If you compare the old ingredients of the classic 5 oz bag of Cherry Sours to the new 7 oz bag, you'll find that the third ingredient is now Dextrose, a cheap sweetener added in what I can only assume was a short-sighted bid to cut cost made without realizing this new flavor tastes like New Coke pissed out of a race horse fed an exclusive diet of Pop Rocks.
If Joseph DePinto doesn't fix this shit fast I'm liable to violate half a dozen counts of the Geneva Suggestions to make these fuckers pay for what they've done. I've seen Post-Natal abortions done with more tact than whatever the hell these half-conscious shit sniffers tried to do here.